Loving Wild Things
I fall in love all the time. With people, places, and animals. My heart is so easily consumed by love. Sometimes it's tender, affectionate love for a good friend. Other times it's big, indescribable love that leaves you bent and broken when it's over.
You could argue that the frequency I say I'm in love denigrates the emotion and that it doesn't mean as much. I think that's certainly possible, but I've been sensitive and emotional all my life. Or tender-hearted as Maya Angelou describes in I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings. Love in all its forms feels like a Big Emotion to me.
I struggle with my love of animals. I love dogs and cats fiercely. When my dog passed away at the age of 13 after having a stroke, my heart bled for days and I still miss him desperately. And then I fall in love with animals that aren't mine to love. I still can't look at tuxedo cats that resemble the kitten my ex and I got together. Knowing I'll never see that sweet little nugget makes my heart hurt.
I fell in love at my job, too. His name is Thor and he's a massive, beautiful Bernese Mountain Dog. He's my favorite Instagram subject. But now that I've resigned from YRK and am freelancing while looking for new opportunities, I'll probably never see Thor again. Saying goodbye to him on my last day was the hardest part of leaving. Facing not having steady work doesn't worry me; instead, I grieve for yet another pet I've loved that isn't mine to love forever.
Loving wild things is hard. And isn't everything wild at heart? Today I have no tips to give you. I'm writing to "keep it real," so you can see past the polished image and know it's okay to love hard. If you need someone to talk through the "heart hurts" as I like to call them, I'm your girl.